no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
