Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
