I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
