if you like me you must not know who I am
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Randomize
