come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
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