he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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