I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
