Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
