hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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