i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
