He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize