You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
