U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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