so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
