Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
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