Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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