I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
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