...so i touched it.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Randomize
