careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
