i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
He is an equal opportunity slut.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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