i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
