he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes