I'm gonna have a badass scar
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize