Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Umm I'm too high to move.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
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Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize