I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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