i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
