Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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