But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
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It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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