do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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