Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"

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(516): View more from New York

Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"

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(925): View more from California

its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife

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(864): View more from South Carolina

For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

My vibrator challenges you to a duel.

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(808): View more from Hawaii

I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever

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(407): View more from Florida

Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.

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