HIV tests are more positive than that guy
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
