she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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