Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
