Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
