Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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