When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
wow bdsm is so cute
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
