Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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