Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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