thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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