In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Terrible idea I love it
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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