I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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