and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Randomize