I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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