She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
