whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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