I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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