This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
NoShamevember. You game?
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
