You just made me feel so damn special
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
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