im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
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