K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
