I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
