Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Randomize
