an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
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